Connecting Through Music
How one Norfolk charity brought generations together with music thanks to our funding
Adam and Gemma took some time out to visit a Friend in Deed project funded by Norfolk Community Foundation.
This funding opportunity was special, because it represents the love and legacy of Sheila Ann Day. She left the Foundation a gift in her will to support music education and appreciation in the county she cherished, and we created a fund in her name to honour her legacy.
For two years, Friend In Deed have been awarded funding to create friendship across generations through music. They have helped reduce loneliness among both young families struggling to make connections and older people at risk of isolation through their Music For All Ages project.
Friend in Deed Project Worker Jo Herrieven said:
“We recognise that both parents/carers and elderly people living in care homes, including those living with dementia are at high risk of loneliness and social isolation. The friendships created between the generations are crucial to supporting mental and physical well-being, and we hear frequently that our sessions are the only group many parents/carers attend on a regular basis, and the activity care home residents enjoy the most each week.”
Adam and Gemma from the Foundation went to visit the group at one of their sessions at a care home in North Norfolk. Entering the session, they were met by volunteer Kay, who first came into the group 4 years ago. Kay was raising her first child when the pandemic hit, and she told us about how Friend In Deed gave her a lifeline:
“We learnt about Friend in Deed during COVID. I was actually pregnant with my daughter during COVID. It was so scary because we had no idea what was going on, but then when COVID lifted I had my little girl, so we started coming to the groups with her. And she just absolutely loved it. It was tricky to start with, but she soon got in the swing of it.”
Some of the children were at their first session and were nervous, and the residents were sitting quietly, not all sure how to react. As the music started and the children began to sing and dance, however, the change across the room was incredible. Some of the older residents like Fred sprang up, excitedly joining in the dancing, helping with parachute games, or helping parents bounce babies and toddlers. Kay told us:
“You start building them bonds. There was a couple of ladies she was getting really friendly with and a gentleman – Fred. He’s our superhero. He’s fantastic. And once you get them bonds, it’s literally like having extended family.”
Fred’s daughter had told Friend in Deed about the difference their sessions had made for her dad. She explained that:
“Over the years it has been so painful to see the devastating impact dementia has had on him, he doesn’t always recognise me and is totally dependent on the care the wonderful staff give him. Unbelievably he seems to come alive when the children from Friend in Deed visit him. It’s almost as if the years have been stripped away and he’s my old dad again.”
Meanwhile, the older children were approaching those seated to include them in the fun – bringing them bells and pompoms to shake. By the end of the session, everyone was smiling, laughing and joining in. With the music winding down, parents were free to spend time playing with their children with the residents. Adam and Gemma spoke to Kay again, who explained to us why the connections were so important for her and her children especially, and the impact is has had on them:
“My children’s grandparents and great grandparents are in Kent, so they’re not accessible to us. It was a way of being social, because if you don’t show your children how to care, then, younger generations aren’t going to assume that’s part of life and do it.”
Jo told us about why the Sheila Ann Day fund was the prefect opportunity for Friend in Deed:
“Prior to working as Project Worker for Friend in Deed, I worked in secondary education as a music teacher for over 12 years and saw how music supported the mental and physical well being in young people, giving a means of expression and purpose. It has been a dream to be able to organise our large intergenerational singing events involving care home residents and school aged children, music and movement sessions for babies and pre-school children in care homes and in person/zoom choir sessions through the Sheila Ann Day Fund. It is truly magic to see how singing and music making connects people that might have 70+ years difference in age.”
Adam and Gemma left feeling energised and positive about the impact that this integration project will continue to have in the coming months. Adam said
“It’s so inspiring and comforting to know that Shiela Ann Day’s legacy is having such an impact. Her love of music will be carried by these people always, and the work that Friend in Deed is doing a reminder of that love.”
